I will dare to do what I do
Be just who I am
& dance whenever I want to
I want to hear music with my eyes closed
and dig my toes in the sand
I want to climb a mountain
and YELL
& sleep under the stars
I want to laugh my head off
& sleep in
& spill coffee
& wear pink
and trip holding your hand
because I am listening so closely♥
Wednesday, December 30, 2009
Tuesday, December 29, 2009
breathe in the sweetest moments
Was 2009 a good year for you?
Honestly, overall I'd say it's been a hard year. There have been moments of extreme joy and also moments of deep sadness... but God is good through it all.
What was your favorite moment of the year?
favorite moments in time of 2009: 1) riding on a ski lift type contraption up the mountains in Capri, Italy. The view was unreal.. overlooking the sea and the town below.. I had my ipod on and I was listening to 'God of Wonders'. Most amazing worship experience of my life.
2)generally speaking, playing volleyball. This game is just so good for my soul. I loved having the opportunity to play competitively again this year.
3) moments with friends and family who I love dearly and fill my life with laughter and joy.
What was your least favorite moment?
fighting against my desires.. being torn between how things are and how they could be.. moments of not understanding and not knowing what to do..
Where were you when 2009 began?
in my living room.. home alone.. lol
Where will you be when 2009 ends?
I will be in Erica Abel's barn with many friends bringing in the new year together!
Did you keep your new years resolution of 2009?
I made some great progress in each area, so I'm going to say yes.
Do you have a new years resolution for 2010?
I'm certain I will once I sit down and think about it more.
Did you fall in love in 2009?
actually...
If so, with who?
don't worry about it :)
What was the stupidest thing you did this year?
oh yikes. lol let's not go there.
You regret it?
more or less...
Did you break up with anyone in 2009?
yeeeash...
Did you make any new friends in 2009?
I did! and wonderful friends at that!
What was your favorite month of 2009?
May was good. So was October... and November.. and December.. haha
Did you travel outside of the US in 2009?
yep! Italy!
How many states did you travel to in 2009?
hmm.. maybe just like 3?
Did you lose anybody close to you in 2009?
No, I was blessed in not having to go through that this year.
What was your favorite movie that you saw in 2009?
oh i don't even know! i feel like i missed out on seeing all of the good movies this year.
Who was your favorite artist from 2009?
rascal always and forever. I also got kind of into John Mayer this year haha
How many concerts did you see in 2009?
just two I think: Dave Barnes & NKOTB/Jesse McCartney
How much money did you spend in 2009?
more than I should have...
What was your proudest moment of 2009?
hmm...good question. I don't know of any particular moments but I'm proud of myself for taking risks this year... and for asking some hard questions.. and for some qualities I discovered in myself through the tests along the way.
What was your most embarrassing moment of 2009?
giving a shout out during the middle of a sunday sermon.. and this is no small church I go to. I don't know what came over me. Sitting alone with noone beside me to laugh with over what just happened did not help either.
If you could go back in time to any moment of 2009, and change something what would it be?
you live, you learn...
What are your plans for 2010?
internship in indy during January, trying to balance a busy schedule this fall and next spring, find something fabulous to do this summer, love more, worry less.
blessings.
Honestly, overall I'd say it's been a hard year. There have been moments of extreme joy and also moments of deep sadness... but God is good through it all.
What was your favorite moment of the year?
favorite moments in time of 2009: 1) riding on a ski lift type contraption up the mountains in Capri, Italy. The view was unreal.. overlooking the sea and the town below.. I had my ipod on and I was listening to 'God of Wonders'. Most amazing worship experience of my life.
2)generally speaking, playing volleyball. This game is just so good for my soul. I loved having the opportunity to play competitively again this year.
3) moments with friends and family who I love dearly and fill my life with laughter and joy.
What was your least favorite moment?
fighting against my desires.. being torn between how things are and how they could be.. moments of not understanding and not knowing what to do..
Where were you when 2009 began?
in my living room.. home alone.. lol
Where will you be when 2009 ends?
I will be in Erica Abel's barn with many friends bringing in the new year together!
Did you keep your new years resolution of 2009?
I made some great progress in each area, so I'm going to say yes.
Do you have a new years resolution for 2010?
I'm certain I will once I sit down and think about it more.
Did you fall in love in 2009?
actually...
If so, with who?
don't worry about it :)
What was the stupidest thing you did this year?
oh yikes. lol let's not go there.
You regret it?
more or less...
Did you break up with anyone in 2009?
yeeeash...
Did you make any new friends in 2009?
I did! and wonderful friends at that!
What was your favorite month of 2009?
May was good. So was October... and November.. and December.. haha
Did you travel outside of the US in 2009?
yep! Italy!
How many states did you travel to in 2009?
hmm.. maybe just like 3?
Did you lose anybody close to you in 2009?
No, I was blessed in not having to go through that this year.
What was your favorite movie that you saw in 2009?
oh i don't even know! i feel like i missed out on seeing all of the good movies this year.
Who was your favorite artist from 2009?
rascal always and forever. I also got kind of into John Mayer this year haha
How many concerts did you see in 2009?
just two I think: Dave Barnes & NKOTB/Jesse McCartney
How much money did you spend in 2009?
more than I should have...
What was your proudest moment of 2009?
hmm...good question. I don't know of any particular moments but I'm proud of myself for taking risks this year... and for asking some hard questions.. and for some qualities I discovered in myself through the tests along the way.
What was your most embarrassing moment of 2009?
giving a shout out during the middle of a sunday sermon.. and this is no small church I go to. I don't know what came over me. Sitting alone with noone beside me to laugh with over what just happened did not help either.
If you could go back in time to any moment of 2009, and change something what would it be?
you live, you learn...
What are your plans for 2010?
internship in indy during January, trying to balance a busy schedule this fall and next spring, find something fabulous to do this summer, love more, worry less.
blessings.
half of my heart
I was born in the arms of imaginary friends
free to roam, made a home out of everywhere I've been
then you come crashing in, like the realest thing
trying my best to understand all that your love can bring
oh, half of my heart's got a grip on the situation
half of my heart takes time
half of my heart's got a right mind to tell you
that I can't keep loving you (can't keep loving you)
oh with half of my heart
I was made to believe I'd never love somebody else
made a plan, stay the man who can only love himself
lonely was the song I sang, 'til the day you came
showing me another way and all that my love can bring
oh, half of my heart's got a grip on the situation
half of my heart takes time
half of my heart's got a right mind to tell you
that I can't keep loving you (can't keep loving you)
oh with half of my heart
with half of my heart
your faith is strong
but I can only fall short for so long
down the road, later on you will hate that I never gave more to you than half of my heart
but I can't stop loving you
I can't stop loving you
I can't stop loving you I can't stop loving you
I can't stop loving you
with half of my...half of my heart
oh half of my heart
half of my heart's got a real good imagination
half of my heart's got you
half of my heart's got a right mind to tell you
that half of my heart won't do
half of my heart is a shot gun wedding to a bride with a paper ring
and half of my heart is the part of a man who's never truly loved anything
half of my heart, oh half of my heart
half of my heart, oh half of my heart
half of my heart, oh half of my heart
half of my heart...
free to roam, made a home out of everywhere I've been
then you come crashing in, like the realest thing
trying my best to understand all that your love can bring
oh, half of my heart's got a grip on the situation
half of my heart takes time
half of my heart's got a right mind to tell you
that I can't keep loving you (can't keep loving you)
oh with half of my heart
I was made to believe I'd never love somebody else
made a plan, stay the man who can only love himself
lonely was the song I sang, 'til the day you came
showing me another way and all that my love can bring
oh, half of my heart's got a grip on the situation
half of my heart takes time
half of my heart's got a right mind to tell you
that I can't keep loving you (can't keep loving you)
oh with half of my heart
with half of my heart
your faith is strong
but I can only fall short for so long
down the road, later on you will hate that I never gave more to you than half of my heart
but I can't stop loving you
I can't stop loving you
I can't stop loving you I can't stop loving you
I can't stop loving you
with half of my...half of my heart
oh half of my heart
half of my heart's got a real good imagination
half of my heart's got you
half of my heart's got a right mind to tell you
that half of my heart won't do
half of my heart is a shot gun wedding to a bride with a paper ring
and half of my heart is the part of a man who's never truly loved anything
half of my heart, oh half of my heart
half of my heart, oh half of my heart
half of my heart, oh half of my heart
half of my heart...
Saturday, December 26, 2009
the love note of a lifetime
I wanted to give you something to read that make might you smile tonight. I looked over from my laptop and saw this very special picture frame I have in my room. In this picture frame there is a note.. a note written for me from a special Honduran friend of mine. I met Victor the summer after my sophomore year of high school. He spoke very little to no English so communication was rather tricky and the following love letter was written with the help of one of his friends serving as a translator. It was a short lived infatuation with my beautiful foreign friend, but I tell ya... no man in my future will ever write me a note so precious as this one. Enjoy :)
-----------------------------------------------
28/08/05
to: Lizzy (apparently I didn't annunciate my name very well..?)
From: Victor
I'm very thankFul with you For you Friendship
~~~~~~~~
I want to Tell you whaT you are a person very special For my LiFe.
While we were playing voleibol I Feeling something for you.
~~~~~~~~
Excuse me but you are a person vere beatiFul and I like you so much.
I'm in love oF you.
I wiL miss you Forever
Good luck!
BYE
VICTOR
Keep in Mind
Don't Forget
--------------------------------------------
-----------------------------------------------
28/08/05
to: Lizzy (apparently I didn't annunciate my name very well..?)
From: Victor
I'm very thankFul with you For you Friendship
~~~~~~~~
I want to Tell you whaT you are a person very special For my LiFe.
While we were playing voleibol I Feeling something for you.
~~~~~~~~
Excuse me but you are a person vere beatiFul and I like you so much.
I'm in love oF you.
I wiL miss you Forever
Good luck!
BYE
VICTOR
Keep in Mind
Don't Forget
--------------------------------------------
Thursday, December 24, 2009
don't think i don't think about it
Father,
It's Christmas. It's the day that I'm supposed to be remembering and celebrating you coming to Earth and how your life and death changed everything for me. I'm supposed to be praising you for all of your wonderful works in my life and saving my soul. I should be rereading the beginning of Matthew and letting my mind be filled with wonder and awe. But Lord... my heart isn't there this year. I guess you were probably expecting this from me, huh? It's kind of become a trend these past months for me... knowing what I should be doing and doing the exact opposite. God, it's been awhile since I've talked to you like this and why I'm actually considering posting this on my blog is beyond me... I tried writing out a sentimental Christmas themed post for my friends and I just couldn't do it... nothing seems genuine in me anymore... I don't know where my heart is at.. I figured this might be my best approach at being genuine and offering words that may be of value.
You know what's hard for me to understand though.... as much as people in my life fear that I'm making decisions that are more or less scaring me for life (ha), I finally feel happy again.. so how is that wrong? And in a way.. it feels healthy... I feel like I'm finally being liberated from my fear of judgment, my fear of how I'm perceived by others... It's not important to me. I gave up on my life ambition of having every single person I meet think highly of me. I gave up on trying to please everyone. And God, it is liberating!!
Father, you know I love you and you are the one that I do want to please with my life. Here's the thing though... I want convictions that are real. To be honest, at this point in my life, I'm not sure we're on the same page on certain things. Actually, not so much that as I'm just not sure what page you're on.. There are things I've done that people tell me are hurtful, and there's a voice in my head that echos that same thing... but I'm not sure it's your voice. It sounds more like a sunday school teacher voice, or just that voice i've known since i was a child of dos and don'ts. I want to hear your voice. If something I'm doing is not pleasing to you then tell me, but I want to know why. I want sincere convictions. It's not enough for me to just follow the rules because that's how I've been taught anymore. I feel like over this past year my eyes have really been opened to the world. God, I hate living by the law... I'm sorry if that makes me a terrible follower of you but I've just always been more of a grace person. It's always been about our relationship Lord, not a rule book.
Tonight you asked me a question. I know it was you because it's always you that comes up with these brilliant questions that getting me thinking in directions I would have never set myself to thinking. You asked, "Lindsay, what is your heart's desire right now? What is your pursuit?" And it amazes me that I have no idea. I can't say that I've been pursuing to grow closer to you... that apparently is not truth. I think perhaps this started when I began desiring change for my life. I felt stuck in the same heartache and stuck in my ways and stuck waiting on you and I needed to see something different... And here I am God. And I can't even say that I feel lost or broken or that I'm sorry. I don't feel those things God. I feel happy and I feel strong and it doesn't make sense to me. I think I've been waiting to have some kind of emotional and spiritual breakdown where I suddenly have my eyes opened to how much I've screwed up and how much I need you to take me back in your arms.... but that day is yet to come and God it kind of scares me. You've always been the one to guide me and now here I am and I've kind of taken things into my own hands more or less and I feel good! It doesn't make sense... I don't understand what you're doing here... honestly, it's one of those times where I feel like you're totally oblivious to what's going on..
Father, I desire to be a genuine person. I desire to be a person that lives with passion. I desire to be a person that loves deeply and lives freely. I desire the richest experiences this world has to offer. I desire to have a relationship with you that is stable, and powerful, and beautiful, and effects every aspect of my life here, and is eternal. It's Christmas. This day is about you Lord. And even though, you and everyone else knows what a crazy wonderful disaster I've been lately (ha), I still choose to praise you for everything you are and all that you're doing that I don't currently see or understand. Thank you for allowing me to go on this journey... I just pray you'll help me understand...show me whatever it is I'm missing. And please give my friends and family patience with me. And please, when it's time, win my heart back.
Lord, please bless my friends and family this Christmas. They are all so wonderful to me even when I know I don't deserve it. Thank you for putting each one of them in my life. Bless them. I love you, dad.
It's Christmas. It's the day that I'm supposed to be remembering and celebrating you coming to Earth and how your life and death changed everything for me. I'm supposed to be praising you for all of your wonderful works in my life and saving my soul. I should be rereading the beginning of Matthew and letting my mind be filled with wonder and awe. But Lord... my heart isn't there this year. I guess you were probably expecting this from me, huh? It's kind of become a trend these past months for me... knowing what I should be doing and doing the exact opposite. God, it's been awhile since I've talked to you like this and why I'm actually considering posting this on my blog is beyond me... I tried writing out a sentimental Christmas themed post for my friends and I just couldn't do it... nothing seems genuine in me anymore... I don't know where my heart is at.. I figured this might be my best approach at being genuine and offering words that may be of value.
You know what's hard for me to understand though.... as much as people in my life fear that I'm making decisions that are more or less scaring me for life (ha), I finally feel happy again.. so how is that wrong? And in a way.. it feels healthy... I feel like I'm finally being liberated from my fear of judgment, my fear of how I'm perceived by others... It's not important to me. I gave up on my life ambition of having every single person I meet think highly of me. I gave up on trying to please everyone. And God, it is liberating!!
Father, you know I love you and you are the one that I do want to please with my life. Here's the thing though... I want convictions that are real. To be honest, at this point in my life, I'm not sure we're on the same page on certain things. Actually, not so much that as I'm just not sure what page you're on.. There are things I've done that people tell me are hurtful, and there's a voice in my head that echos that same thing... but I'm not sure it's your voice. It sounds more like a sunday school teacher voice, or just that voice i've known since i was a child of dos and don'ts. I want to hear your voice. If something I'm doing is not pleasing to you then tell me, but I want to know why. I want sincere convictions. It's not enough for me to just follow the rules because that's how I've been taught anymore. I feel like over this past year my eyes have really been opened to the world. God, I hate living by the law... I'm sorry if that makes me a terrible follower of you but I've just always been more of a grace person. It's always been about our relationship Lord, not a rule book.
Tonight you asked me a question. I know it was you because it's always you that comes up with these brilliant questions that getting me thinking in directions I would have never set myself to thinking. You asked, "Lindsay, what is your heart's desire right now? What is your pursuit?" And it amazes me that I have no idea. I can't say that I've been pursuing to grow closer to you... that apparently is not truth. I think perhaps this started when I began desiring change for my life. I felt stuck in the same heartache and stuck in my ways and stuck waiting on you and I needed to see something different... And here I am God. And I can't even say that I feel lost or broken or that I'm sorry. I don't feel those things God. I feel happy and I feel strong and it doesn't make sense to me. I think I've been waiting to have some kind of emotional and spiritual breakdown where I suddenly have my eyes opened to how much I've screwed up and how much I need you to take me back in your arms.... but that day is yet to come and God it kind of scares me. You've always been the one to guide me and now here I am and I've kind of taken things into my own hands more or less and I feel good! It doesn't make sense... I don't understand what you're doing here... honestly, it's one of those times where I feel like you're totally oblivious to what's going on..
Father, I desire to be a genuine person. I desire to be a person that lives with passion. I desire to be a person that loves deeply and lives freely. I desire the richest experiences this world has to offer. I desire to have a relationship with you that is stable, and powerful, and beautiful, and effects every aspect of my life here, and is eternal. It's Christmas. This day is about you Lord. And even though, you and everyone else knows what a crazy wonderful disaster I've been lately (ha), I still choose to praise you for everything you are and all that you're doing that I don't currently see or understand. Thank you for allowing me to go on this journey... I just pray you'll help me understand...show me whatever it is I'm missing. And please give my friends and family patience with me. And please, when it's time, win my heart back.
Lord, please bless my friends and family this Christmas. They are all so wonderful to me even when I know I don't deserve it. Thank you for putting each one of them in my life. Bless them. I love you, dad.
Saturday, December 19, 2009
Oy vey!
Back from Chi-town and feelin good! ....*long sigh of relief*..... it feels SO good to be finished with finals and have this semester behind me! This past weekend a group of eight of my closest HU girlfriends and I went out to Chicago just to enjoy the city, enjoy each other, and celebrate the end of a semester during which we were entirely too busy for our own good and missed out on having time to spend with each other. It was wonderful. Fun, refreshing, and just good for my soul! Ah, I love you girls! :)
And now I'm home! I'm real excited to have this long break but we'll see how many days it takes before i start getting restless haha. BUT I'm working on adopting this new life mantra. I'm not quite sure how I want to word it yet... but I know the general principles behind it. It's going to be fabulous though lol. I'm just lovin life lately I tell ya haha. Anyways let's make some lists since that's what we all like here.
Things I'm excited about!
1)The Bachelor 2010 starting January 4th with.... JAKE PAVELKA!
2)Iceskating with some of the girls Tuesday
3)Christmas!
4) New Years at Erica's! I'm thinking I might actually have a good New Year's Eve for the first time in my life this year!
5) New Years resolutions aka... new life mantra. lol
6) figuring out how to arrange to uproot my life and move to Italy permanately.
7) this new John Mayer music on my itunes
8) today is Bekah's birthday! happy birthday girl!
9) going to stay with Laura on monday/meet and greet and win over the hearts of the company I'll hopefully be interning for this January.
10) having Lindsay time! so many books to read... so many baths to take... so much coffee to drink... so many movies to watch... so much friend and family time to be had... oh it's going to be wonderful!!
Here's a list of the books I want to read before the start of the spring semester
1)Eat, Pray, Love (in progress)
2)Jane Ayre
3)Any Jodi Picoult book (taking suggestions. already read My Sister's Keeper)
4)Letters for Lizzie
5)God's Will As a Way of Life (for the third time? okay.)
Well friends, thanks for reading. Congratulations on making it through the semester/almost through another year. I'll probably be writing more now that I'm home and have nothing to do with my life so get excited!! lol
LOVE YOU ALL! have a beautiful day.
And now I'm home! I'm real excited to have this long break but we'll see how many days it takes before i start getting restless haha. BUT I'm working on adopting this new life mantra. I'm not quite sure how I want to word it yet... but I know the general principles behind it. It's going to be fabulous though lol. I'm just lovin life lately I tell ya haha. Anyways let's make some lists since that's what we all like here.
Things I'm excited about!
1)The Bachelor 2010 starting January 4th with.... JAKE PAVELKA!
2)Iceskating with some of the girls Tuesday
3)Christmas!
4) New Years at Erica's! I'm thinking I might actually have a good New Year's Eve for the first time in my life this year!
5) New Years resolutions aka... new life mantra. lol
6) figuring out how to arrange to uproot my life and move to Italy permanately.
7) this new John Mayer music on my itunes
8) today is Bekah's birthday! happy birthday girl!
9) going to stay with Laura on monday/meet and greet and win over the hearts of the company I'll hopefully be interning for this January.
10) having Lindsay time! so many books to read... so many baths to take... so much coffee to drink... so many movies to watch... so much friend and family time to be had... oh it's going to be wonderful!!
Here's a list of the books I want to read before the start of the spring semester
1)Eat, Pray, Love (in progress)
2)Jane Ayre
3)Any Jodi Picoult book (taking suggestions. already read My Sister's Keeper)
4)Letters for Lizzie
5)God's Will As a Way of Life (for the third time? okay.)
Well friends, thanks for reading. Congratulations on making it through the semester/almost through another year. I'll probably be writing more now that I'm home and have nothing to do with my life so get excited!! lol
LOVE YOU ALL! have a beautiful day.
Monday, December 14, 2009
focus lindsay. focus.
soooo i've kind of got this problem. you see, i don't in particularly have any desire to care about my finals this week. I think it's going to be just fine though. Today I went to an animal shelter and I hung out with some pretty fun cats for awhile. We had special bonding time. I formed an especially close relationship with Mr. Remus. He was super cool... a real intellect. I wanted to take him home. Here's a discovery of the day... we were at Uncle Bill's pet store admiring all the fish, and I tell ya.. we have an amazing Creator. Those fish were all just so interestingly designed... one of them had these crazy patterns of florescent colors and crazy fins that were all just freaking out and flapping around so fast. They were all just so different and interesting. It amazes me how even the smallest fish of the sea reflect such unique design. Creation never ceases to speak of His wonders...
Another thought.... I'm so thankful for my friends right now. I've really been enjoying my life lately and I have them (/you) to thank for that haha. But really. Let's make a list of other things I'm thankful for right now. Okay, ready, go.
1. philosophy study guides
2. panera coffee and how it's causing my body to shake right now
3. Chi-town in T-3 days
4. Michael's sweatshirt that I may or may not wear every day this week
5. being done with Salesmanship forever!
6. shiny metallic purple outfits at Burlington
7. long conversations about life when you 'should' be studying
8. knowing what's ultimately important in life
9. experiences and fun along the way
Is it going to bother you if I don't have a #10? okay, good. :)
I love you all. Thanks for stopping by and have a great Tuesday!
Another thought.... I'm so thankful for my friends right now. I've really been enjoying my life lately and I have them (/you) to thank for that haha. But really. Let's make a list of other things I'm thankful for right now. Okay, ready, go.
1. philosophy study guides
2. panera coffee and how it's causing my body to shake right now
3. Chi-town in T-3 days
4. Michael's sweatshirt that I may or may not wear every day this week
5. being done with Salesmanship forever!
6. shiny metallic purple outfits at Burlington
7. long conversations about life when you 'should' be studying
8. knowing what's ultimately important in life
9. experiences and fun along the way
Is it going to bother you if I don't have a #10? okay, good. :)
I love you all. Thanks for stopping by and have a great Tuesday!
Saturday, December 12, 2009
grey poupon
hey friends,
i'm kind of in a crazy irrational explosive mood right now so just a warning :) it's been decided that the blue poupon is responsible for triggering this emotion. But I'm not here to talk about emotions or anger or throwing glass vases at trees... Im here because I don't want to sleep quite yet and kind of just want to do a survey.. you know, the kind that you probably don't care about but then it's kind of amusing to read through anyways.. that's the kind. so enjoy.
1. Where is the person who has your heart? don't want to talk about it haha (off to a great start here)
2. What does your last text message say? 'oh well i guess everyone in hardy and wright were freaked out and talking about it cause it was so loud. haha' (make of that what you will)
3. What is the wallpaper on your phone? curvy green beams of light. (mother's phone.. haven't changed it)
4. What did you do today? got Mcds,watched Mean Girls with Jeanine and Jana,went swimming with Jeanine, went to dinner with Erica, went to an art dept. christmas party, had game night, got really angry sometime during game night, went around throwing things like a glass vase at a tree, chilled out, regrouped, and relaxed
5. What do you want for your birthday? wellllll....
6. Is there anyone who doesn't like you? I'm going to guess yes but I really try not to have enemies.
7. Where did you get the shirt you are wearing? HU volleyball
8. When was the last time you laughed really hard?tonight when Jeanine and I were just so mad for no reason.
9. Are you happy? contrary to the theme of this blog, yes I'm very happy. :)
10. Do you miss anyone? probably.
11. What are you craving at the moment? i'm kind of thirsty actually. maybe some juice?
12. Have a best friend? a couple actually and it's a beautiful thing
13. Does the last person who texted you make you smile? certainly.
14. When is the last time you cried?a few days ago
15. Will this weekend be a good one? this weekend has been a GREAT one.haha
16. Where do you want to live when you are old?Oh I change my mind about this a lot but maybe Italy, or Chicago, or Colorado. Those are my top three right now lol. Dream big right?
17. Are you in a complicated relationship? more or less. but probably less.
18. Who's the biggest asshole you know? dah...
19. Are you planning on going to college? looks that way. i still consider dropping out at least once a week though haha
20. What are you listening to right now? nothing. it's silent and it's wonderful.
21. Are you looking forward to anything?Chi-town trip with the girls in a week, Christmas break, Jterm internship in Indy...
22. Who is your crush right now? haha oooh buddy...
23. What does the 7th text in your phone say? 'OK that's fine'(lame. sorry.)
24. How old are you? twenty. suck.
25. One food you definitely cannot stand? pretty sure i like it all.
26. When was the last time you dyed or cut your hair? happy with it? I haven't cut it since June and no I'm not happy with it. I want it to be super long again. I miss my hair.
27. How many songs are on your iTunes?: 1787? did i make that number up?
28. Any song ruined for you because of a certain someone?: a few.
29. How do you think other people view you?: that i'm pretty quiet. and oh how wrong they are! lol just kidding.. but seriously..
30. Do you usually know when someones lying to you? I'm getting good at knowing yes.
31. Is everyone a good person till proved wrong in your book? i suppose.
32. Do different brands of water actually taste different?: probably but it doesn't impact my water decisions too much.
33. Your last incoming call from the opposite sex?my brother.
34. Are you dressing up for Halloween this year?this past year I was Pebbles lol
35. When was the last time you totally broke down? oh it's been a few weeks now.
36. What are your plans for tomorrow? go to my home church with jeanine and then stay at my house all day to study/get away. Christmas party at the 807 in the evening? maybe?
37. Do you remember what you wore last night? i do. jeans and a black shirt.
38. Does it matter to you if your boyfriend/girlfriend smokes? depends what they're smokin and how often they're smoking it. so yes i guess it does matter.
39. Was it a boy or a girl to text you first today? a girl
40. What were you doing at midnight last night? haha. oh gosh. hard tellin...
41. What gets on your nerves? a lot of things have been lately haha
42. Where EXACTLY were you when you entered 2009? at home alone on my couch. i think i may or may not have done a cartwheel just to spice up the evening a little. again, not something i want to talk about.
43. Have you ever kissed anyone with a tongue ring?no and i'm thinking i'd be very nervous to lol
44. How many times has your ex made you cry? ha. haha. ha.
45. Have you ever liked someone that you didn't expect to? yeah i suppose you could say that.
46. What made you pissed off today? being super cold trying to sleep and board games
47. Would your parents be mad if you came home drunk? lol mad isn't even the word...
48. Is there someone you want to see? probably.
49. Could you last in a relationship for over a year? i'd like to think so.
50. Who was the first person you talked to this morning? Jana
51. Ever told someone you loved them and meant it? define love.
52. Was last night terrible? haha not in the least
53. Do you currently like someone who doesn't know you exist? no, that would be a situation..
54. If you could have one thing right now what would it be? trick question.
55. Does anyone hate you? I would hope not.
56. What are you doing tonight? about to go to bed.
57. Have you chewed gum after someone else already has? probably.
58. Have you ever seen your best friend cry?yes :(
59. Did you sleep with anyone last night? Jana! be jealous.
60. Do you like to be alone? yes, my alone time is vital to my well being.
61. Ever been cheated on? no comment.
62. If you had to choose, would you rather be an alcoholic or a pothead? hmm..that's a tough one. for the time being i'm going to say an alcoholic but i might change my mind.
63. Can you honestly say that at this point and time you're happy with the way things are going in your life? for the most part..
64. When will your next kiss be? you just never know.lol
65. You kissed someone today, didn't you? false.
66. Who was the last person who high-fived you? sadetina lol
67. Are your parents in love?yes sir.
68. Would you rather sleep at a friend's or have them over? i enjoy both.
69. How late did you stay up last night and why?like 4 or 5 am and because i was loving life lol
70. Have you ever kissed someone whose name started with a K? haha yeah.
That's all I've got for you. Sorry, kind of lame. I love you all! Good luck with your finals and all that craziness.
Love,
i'm kind of in a crazy irrational explosive mood right now so just a warning :) it's been decided that the blue poupon is responsible for triggering this emotion. But I'm not here to talk about emotions or anger or throwing glass vases at trees... Im here because I don't want to sleep quite yet and kind of just want to do a survey.. you know, the kind that you probably don't care about but then it's kind of amusing to read through anyways.. that's the kind. so enjoy.
1. Where is the person who has your heart? don't want to talk about it haha (off to a great start here)
2. What does your last text message say? 'oh well i guess everyone in hardy and wright were freaked out and talking about it cause it was so loud. haha' (make of that what you will)
3. What is the wallpaper on your phone? curvy green beams of light. (mother's phone.. haven't changed it)
4. What did you do today? got Mcds,watched Mean Girls with Jeanine and Jana,went swimming with Jeanine, went to dinner with Erica, went to an art dept. christmas party, had game night, got really angry sometime during game night, went around throwing things like a glass vase at a tree, chilled out, regrouped, and relaxed
5. What do you want for your birthday? wellllll....
6. Is there anyone who doesn't like you? I'm going to guess yes but I really try not to have enemies.
7. Where did you get the shirt you are wearing? HU volleyball
8. When was the last time you laughed really hard?tonight when Jeanine and I were just so mad for no reason.
9. Are you happy? contrary to the theme of this blog, yes I'm very happy. :)
10. Do you miss anyone? probably.
11. What are you craving at the moment? i'm kind of thirsty actually. maybe some juice?
12. Have a best friend? a couple actually and it's a beautiful thing
13. Does the last person who texted you make you smile? certainly.
14. When is the last time you cried?a few days ago
15. Will this weekend be a good one? this weekend has been a GREAT one.haha
16. Where do you want to live when you are old?Oh I change my mind about this a lot but maybe Italy, or Chicago, or Colorado. Those are my top three right now lol. Dream big right?
17. Are you in a complicated relationship? more or less. but probably less.
18. Who's the biggest asshole you know? dah...
19. Are you planning on going to college? looks that way. i still consider dropping out at least once a week though haha
20. What are you listening to right now? nothing. it's silent and it's wonderful.
21. Are you looking forward to anything?Chi-town trip with the girls in a week, Christmas break, Jterm internship in Indy...
22. Who is your crush right now? haha oooh buddy...
23. What does the 7th text in your phone say? 'OK that's fine'(lame. sorry.)
24. How old are you? twenty. suck.
25. One food you definitely cannot stand? pretty sure i like it all.
26. When was the last time you dyed or cut your hair? happy with it? I haven't cut it since June and no I'm not happy with it. I want it to be super long again. I miss my hair.
27. How many songs are on your iTunes?: 1787? did i make that number up?
28. Any song ruined for you because of a certain someone?: a few.
29. How do you think other people view you?: that i'm pretty quiet. and oh how wrong they are! lol just kidding.. but seriously..
30. Do you usually know when someones lying to you? I'm getting good at knowing yes.
31. Is everyone a good person till proved wrong in your book? i suppose.
32. Do different brands of water actually taste different?: probably but it doesn't impact my water decisions too much.
33. Your last incoming call from the opposite sex?my brother.
34. Are you dressing up for Halloween this year?this past year I was Pebbles lol
35. When was the last time you totally broke down? oh it's been a few weeks now.
36. What are your plans for tomorrow? go to my home church with jeanine and then stay at my house all day to study/get away. Christmas party at the 807 in the evening? maybe?
37. Do you remember what you wore last night? i do. jeans and a black shirt.
38. Does it matter to you if your boyfriend/girlfriend smokes? depends what they're smokin and how often they're smoking it. so yes i guess it does matter.
39. Was it a boy or a girl to text you first today? a girl
40. What were you doing at midnight last night? haha. oh gosh. hard tellin...
41. What gets on your nerves? a lot of things have been lately haha
42. Where EXACTLY were you when you entered 2009? at home alone on my couch. i think i may or may not have done a cartwheel just to spice up the evening a little. again, not something i want to talk about.
43. Have you ever kissed anyone with a tongue ring?no and i'm thinking i'd be very nervous to lol
44. How many times has your ex made you cry? ha. haha. ha.
45. Have you ever liked someone that you didn't expect to? yeah i suppose you could say that.
46. What made you pissed off today? being super cold trying to sleep and board games
47. Would your parents be mad if you came home drunk? lol mad isn't even the word...
48. Is there someone you want to see? probably.
49. Could you last in a relationship for over a year? i'd like to think so.
50. Who was the first person you talked to this morning? Jana
51. Ever told someone you loved them and meant it? define love.
52. Was last night terrible? haha not in the least
53. Do you currently like someone who doesn't know you exist? no, that would be a situation..
54. If you could have one thing right now what would it be? trick question.
55. Does anyone hate you? I would hope not.
56. What are you doing tonight? about to go to bed.
57. Have you chewed gum after someone else already has? probably.
58. Have you ever seen your best friend cry?yes :(
59. Did you sleep with anyone last night? Jana! be jealous.
60. Do you like to be alone? yes, my alone time is vital to my well being.
61. Ever been cheated on? no comment.
62. If you had to choose, would you rather be an alcoholic or a pothead? hmm..that's a tough one. for the time being i'm going to say an alcoholic but i might change my mind.
63. Can you honestly say that at this point and time you're happy with the way things are going in your life? for the most part..
64. When will your next kiss be? you just never know.lol
65. You kissed someone today, didn't you? false.
66. Who was the last person who high-fived you? sadetina lol
67. Are your parents in love?yes sir.
68. Would you rather sleep at a friend's or have them over? i enjoy both.
69. How late did you stay up last night and why?like 4 or 5 am and because i was loving life lol
70. Have you ever kissed someone whose name started with a K? haha yeah.
That's all I've got for you. Sorry, kind of lame. I love you all! Good luck with your finals and all that craziness.
Love,
Tuesday, December 8, 2009
someday we'll figure all this out
Today was kind of an exceptionally good day. I recieved news that my design for a local citywide event has been chosen and will be used for all of their promotional materials (billboard, yard signs, church bullletin inserts, t-shirts, stationary..) While this may or may not be a big deal, it's still really exciting to me to have this opportunity for my work to be turned into printed materials for real use for the first time ever! And it sounds like it's going to be a great event, so I feel blessed to contribute to it in this manner. Second piece of exciting news on the day... My potential internship I'm wanting for January is looking very promising. Other good things from today... big marketing presentation done and over, had a lovely evening with a good friend, got to participate in a fun photoshoot for a friend's photography project, and I'm actually in bed by 1:00. What a wonderful day.
Well, just wanted to give an update on my life and share some good news with those of you I don't get to talk to on a daily basis. I really don't have anything else of value to say.... except that I'm really excited for Christmas break! It'll be so nice to have time to read, and sleep in, and take baths, and hang out with my brother all day every day! lol oh i love that kid.
For anyone who actually still (or ever has) checked this, I hope you are doing well and that your day will be so blessed. Go do something fun today. You have my permission.
i love you guys.
Well, just wanted to give an update on my life and share some good news with those of you I don't get to talk to on a daily basis. I really don't have anything else of value to say.... except that I'm really excited for Christmas break! It'll be so nice to have time to read, and sleep in, and take baths, and hang out with my brother all day every day! lol oh i love that kid.
For anyone who actually still (or ever has) checked this, I hope you are doing well and that your day will be so blessed. Go do something fun today. You have my permission.
i love you guys.
Wednesday, November 25, 2009
weep not for the memory
Hi friends!
Oh I'm so happy to finally sit down and take some time to write here. I got in my car after my last class today and it registered that I was finally on Thanksgiving break and I yelled out 'praise the Lord!!!' and laughed the whole way to my apartment. Wow. I've been needing this break.
So I got home and I took a five hour nap and it was glorious. I might not be sleeping for awhile tonight. BUT let me just say.. i am loving this night. LOVING THIS NIGHT!!! I feel like it's been awhile since I've taken time for myself to just relax and reflect.
I've started reading a new book and I'm kind of in love with it. It's called Eat, Pray, Love by Elizabeth Gilbert. The book is kind of like her journal from a year of traveling. She decided to take a year to live in Italy, India, and Indonesia (4 months in each) after going through a rough divorce. In Italy she focuses on the pursuit of pleasure; in India, devotion; and in Indonesia, a balance between worldly enjoyment and divine transcendence. I love it. I love how she writes and I love her passion and her traveling experiences. I almost feel like this is a book I could be writing myself 10 years down the road.. hopefully without the struggles of a divorce as the driving force behind the journey but ah! i would love to take a year to do that kind of traveling and discovery! Also, I love Italy. I spent a couple weeks there this past summer and reading this book just fills me with this yearning and overwhelming heartsickness of desire to get back there as soon as possible!
So tonight I've been doing some reflecting/a little 'soul searching' if you will.. and here's some thoughts I've had...
This time last year thing's were very different. Things were new and promising and pure and good. A year later... not so much. haha. Those same things are complicated and addicting and hurtful. It always takes me awhile to learn and even longer to let go. But this thanksgiving, I'll choose to be thankful for the ability to love, and for friendship, and for great memories, and for the promise of better things ahead, and the strength that comes from faith in those promises.
Another thought I had was how deeply I've been blessed over this past year... God's given me so many great opportunities and great gifts that I never even thought to ask him for. He's answered so many prayers that I never ever voiced. He gave me a friend that gets me in ways I've never had anyone get me lol. He took one of my greatest fears and put me through it... and continues to prove Himself bigger every day. He took my insecurity in my new major and continues to give me more confidence and even recognition and honors in it. He gave me Italy, and volleyball, and new friends. It's always a great thing when God answers our prayers but what really stops me in amazement is when on nights like tonight I see the things He's given that I didn't even know I needed... things I would have maybe never considered asking for.
Blessed indeed.
Things that have made me smile tonight:
-mylifeisaverage.com (new addiction!)
-meykle (i love my brother more than anyone in this world! :) )
-a picture from an Alabama night
-a coffee mug with flowers and butterflys painted on it
-'application to date my little sister' that i found in the room
-talking to someone new
-hannah montana marathon
i hope this long post maybe made up for my lack of writing lately. i tried.
friends,
i love you and i'm so thankful for all of you. you're such blessings to me! have a wonderful thanksgiving - eat lots of food and love on your family!
Oh I'm so happy to finally sit down and take some time to write here. I got in my car after my last class today and it registered that I was finally on Thanksgiving break and I yelled out 'praise the Lord!!!' and laughed the whole way to my apartment. Wow. I've been needing this break.
So I got home and I took a five hour nap and it was glorious. I might not be sleeping for awhile tonight. BUT let me just say.. i am loving this night. LOVING THIS NIGHT!!! I feel like it's been awhile since I've taken time for myself to just relax and reflect.
I've started reading a new book and I'm kind of in love with it. It's called Eat, Pray, Love by Elizabeth Gilbert. The book is kind of like her journal from a year of traveling. She decided to take a year to live in Italy, India, and Indonesia (4 months in each) after going through a rough divorce. In Italy she focuses on the pursuit of pleasure; in India, devotion; and in Indonesia, a balance between worldly enjoyment and divine transcendence. I love it. I love how she writes and I love her passion and her traveling experiences. I almost feel like this is a book I could be writing myself 10 years down the road.. hopefully without the struggles of a divorce as the driving force behind the journey but ah! i would love to take a year to do that kind of traveling and discovery! Also, I love Italy. I spent a couple weeks there this past summer and reading this book just fills me with this yearning and overwhelming heartsickness of desire to get back there as soon as possible!
So tonight I've been doing some reflecting/a little 'soul searching' if you will.. and here's some thoughts I've had...
This time last year thing's were very different. Things were new and promising and pure and good. A year later... not so much. haha. Those same things are complicated and addicting and hurtful. It always takes me awhile to learn and even longer to let go. But this thanksgiving, I'll choose to be thankful for the ability to love, and for friendship, and for great memories, and for the promise of better things ahead, and the strength that comes from faith in those promises.
Another thought I had was how deeply I've been blessed over this past year... God's given me so many great opportunities and great gifts that I never even thought to ask him for. He's answered so many prayers that I never ever voiced. He gave me a friend that gets me in ways I've never had anyone get me lol. He took one of my greatest fears and put me through it... and continues to prove Himself bigger every day. He took my insecurity in my new major and continues to give me more confidence and even recognition and honors in it. He gave me Italy, and volleyball, and new friends. It's always a great thing when God answers our prayers but what really stops me in amazement is when on nights like tonight I see the things He's given that I didn't even know I needed... things I would have maybe never considered asking for.
Blessed indeed.
Things that have made me smile tonight:
-mylifeisaverage.com (new addiction!)
-meykle (i love my brother more than anyone in this world! :) )
-a picture from an Alabama night
-a coffee mug with flowers and butterflys painted on it
-'application to date my little sister' that i found in the room
-talking to someone new
-hannah montana marathon
i hope this long post maybe made up for my lack of writing lately. i tried.
friends,
i love you and i'm so thankful for all of you. you're such blessings to me! have a wonderful thanksgiving - eat lots of food and love on your family!
Thursday, November 19, 2009
been a long time coming
hi friends,
I'm so sorry I have failed at my blogging lately haha. yeah i really don't have a good excuse so i won't even try. tonight is one night when i shouldn't be putting my time towards this however. i should be doing my philosophy paper, or studying for my test, or taking a shower. those things aren't happening though.
i don't feel like using any capital letters right now. maybe later.
i'd like to make a list for you all tonight. i'm thinking maybe a list of new things... things that are new to me in the past month. okay, go.
1) meeting robert mathis
2) eating at nick's kitchen
3) being in kappa pi
4) trying on bridesmaids dresses
5) being early/on time to classes
6) getting better at saying no
7) redboxing a movie
8) orange flavored cinnamon rolls
9) london fog chai
10) staying on campus on the weekends
11) my carhart overhalls hat that i stold from nick's kitchen
that's about all i have.
other thoughts:
1) i'm not liking all this rain
2) why are nuts so expensive?
3) where do nuts even come from?
4) basketball is not something i do well
5) i potentially have plans for january
6) there is someone that i wish would call again
7) i want to see new moon
8) there's a secret place i want to go
9) my eyelids keep closing
goodnight :)
love.love.loooove you all,
I'm so sorry I have failed at my blogging lately haha. yeah i really don't have a good excuse so i won't even try. tonight is one night when i shouldn't be putting my time towards this however. i should be doing my philosophy paper, or studying for my test, or taking a shower. those things aren't happening though.
i don't feel like using any capital letters right now. maybe later.
i'd like to make a list for you all tonight. i'm thinking maybe a list of new things... things that are new to me in the past month. okay, go.
1) meeting robert mathis
2) eating at nick's kitchen
3) being in kappa pi
4) trying on bridesmaids dresses
5) being early/on time to classes
6) getting better at saying no
7) redboxing a movie
8) orange flavored cinnamon rolls
9) london fog chai
10) staying on campus on the weekends
11) my carhart overhalls hat that i stold from nick's kitchen
that's about all i have.
other thoughts:
1) i'm not liking all this rain
2) why are nuts so expensive?
3) where do nuts even come from?
4) basketball is not something i do well
5) i potentially have plans for january
6) there is someone that i wish would call again
7) i want to see new moon
8) there's a secret place i want to go
9) my eyelids keep closing
goodnight :)
love.love.loooove you all,
Monday, November 2, 2009
immeasurably more
I'd like to share with you a thought from an article I stumbled across the other day...
Could it be the case that our fear to make a change is denying God the opportunity to bless us?
Ephesians 3:20 "God can do anything you know, far more than you can ask or think or imagine in your wildest dreams.." (the message)
sorry for my lack of consistency in posting... it's a crazy busy life...two weeks and thing should be settling down for me a bit.
Goals for this week:
1. Be in bed by midnight every night
2. Be on time to every class
3. Be productive
4. Be relational
Could it be the case that our fear to make a change is denying God the opportunity to bless us?
Ephesians 3:20 "God can do anything you know, far more than you can ask or think or imagine in your wildest dreams.." (the message)
sorry for my lack of consistency in posting... it's a crazy busy life...two weeks and thing should be settling down for me a bit.
Goals for this week:
1. Be in bed by midnight every night
2. Be on time to every class
3. Be productive
4. Be relational
Sunday, October 25, 2009
pumpkins & jingle bells
This past week has been crazy. Crazy. In so many ways. There's been a lot of fun. There's been some bad decisions. There's been some new friends. There's been some quality time with old friends. There's been good conversations. There's been pumpkin carving, dream catchers, red hair, and jingle bells. It's been a crazy week.
A few things I've discovered in the past seven days...
1. Next to s'mores, 'flutter nutters' are probably the greatest cooked over the fire treat.
2. 'Replay' by Sean Kingston definitely does just that and replays in your head all day but I don't
mind.
3. Playing the piano is a really good destresser.
4. Four people not doing dishes for a week = an hour's worth of dish washing for one person.
5. There are actually some pretty quality baseball guys at HU. who knew? lol
6. I can be a very impulsive person. This is both good and bad.
7. The movie Elf continues to get funnier every time.
8. I don't think there's anything in the world that makes me feel more valuable than having a
good conversation with a friend.
9. We're all trying too hard to have it all together and not let others in.
10. The heart of life is good. (thank you John Mayer :) )
Friends, I love you guys. Thank you for who you are and what you bring to my life. Have a beautiful day.
Love,
A few things I've discovered in the past seven days...
1. Next to s'mores, 'flutter nutters' are probably the greatest cooked over the fire treat.
2. 'Replay' by Sean Kingston definitely does just that and replays in your head all day but I don't
mind.
3. Playing the piano is a really good destresser.
4. Four people not doing dishes for a week = an hour's worth of dish washing for one person.
5. There are actually some pretty quality baseball guys at HU. who knew? lol
6. I can be a very impulsive person. This is both good and bad.
7. The movie Elf continues to get funnier every time.
8. I don't think there's anything in the world that makes me feel more valuable than having a
good conversation with a friend.
9. We're all trying too hard to have it all together and not let others in.
10. The heart of life is good. (thank you John Mayer :) )
Friends, I love you guys. Thank you for who you are and what you bring to my life. Have a beautiful day.
Love,
Thursday, October 22, 2009
aesthete
It's been a really beautiful week. Aren't you loving this weather? Yesterday I took a nap on a blanket in the backyard. It was pretty fabulous.
So my new life project... I'm teaching myself 'Bless the Broken Road' on the piano/keyboard for now. It's kind of my new favorite thing to do with any free time I have.
Right now I'm waiting on my friend to come visit.
Best friend + fall day + coffee + walk = probably just what I need. :)
Later tonight I've got a latte date with a few other great girls. I'm pumped.
Something I really feel like doing right now.. horseback riding.
Okay, apparently I don't have significant thoughts today.... haha
Best birthday wishes to Sean and Thad Abel today. lol
Oh, and if you were wondering about the title of this post.. 'aesthete' is the word of the day. definition - one having or affecting great sensitivity to beauty, as in art or nature.
I challenge you to use it in a sentence today.
love,
So my new life project... I'm teaching myself 'Bless the Broken Road' on the piano/keyboard for now. It's kind of my new favorite thing to do with any free time I have.
Right now I'm waiting on my friend to come visit.
Best friend + fall day + coffee + walk = probably just what I need. :)
Later tonight I've got a latte date with a few other great girls. I'm pumped.
Something I really feel like doing right now.. horseback riding.
Okay, apparently I don't have significant thoughts today.... haha
Best birthday wishes to Sean and Thad Abel today. lol
Oh, and if you were wondering about the title of this post.. 'aesthete' is the word of the day. definition - one having or affecting great sensitivity to beauty, as in art or nature.
I challenge you to use it in a sentence today.
love,
Friday, October 16, 2009
3 am donuts
haha I love college. It's a really great time of my life. I was just thinking how much I'll miss these days when I'm old.
WELCOME to those dear friends of mine who have just in the past day promised to start following my blog (and leaving comments hopefully! yes?) So glad you actually take time to read this lol.
It's 4 am.... uhhhhm... okay that 3am donut run is not agreeing with my right now. I don't remember why I'm still awake. I have to get up to take a test in 3 hours and then I have a presentation and then I'm leaving for a tournament at Olivet soooo this is silly. Oh well :) I'm just lovin life right now.
thursdays are kind of becoming my new favorite day of the week.
here's my question of the day (I've been wanting to know this for a long time..) :
when does it stop being partly cloudy and start being partly sunny? (best answer wins a prize)
friends- i love you all!! you're great people.
blessings,
WELCOME to those dear friends of mine who have just in the past day promised to start following my blog (and leaving comments hopefully! yes?) So glad you actually take time to read this lol.
It's 4 am.... uhhhhm... okay that 3am donut run is not agreeing with my right now. I don't remember why I'm still awake. I have to get up to take a test in 3 hours and then I have a presentation and then I'm leaving for a tournament at Olivet soooo this is silly. Oh well :) I'm just lovin life right now.
thursdays are kind of becoming my new favorite day of the week.
here's my question of the day (I've been wanting to know this for a long time..) :
when does it stop being partly cloudy and start being partly sunny? (best answer wins a prize)
friends- i love you all!! you're great people.
blessings,
Wednesday, October 14, 2009
that still small voice
my heart hurts. it's that ache that you can't even put words to... you can't justify any reason for the pain.. you just hurt.
I've been reading the book 'Sex God' by Rob Bell. There's a part in this book that I was reading yesterday that talks about the cross.
"It speaks to us of God's suffering, God's pain, God's broken heart. The cross is God's way of saying, "I know what it's like." The execution stake is the creator of the universe saying, "I know how you feel." Our tendency in the midst of suffering is to turn on God. To get angry and bitter and shake our fist at the sky and say, "God, you don't know what it's like! You don't understand! You have no idea what I'm going through. You don't have a clue how much this hurts." The cros is God's way of taking away all of our accusations, excuses, and arguments. The cross is God taking on flesh and blood and saying, "Me too.""
Today I may or may not have a reason to feel the way I do. More importantly, I caused somebody else pain and for that I'm beating myself up inside. I'm human. I trust the wrong people and I say the wrong things. For that I'm sorry.. deeply sorry.
Sometimes when it rains... I like to think that God is crying with me. He knows our pain. He's experienced heartbreak and being wrongly accused and his good intentions taken the wrong way. He's been there. He has the wounds. So today, while my heart is hurting for whatever reason may or may not be there, I'll listen for that still small voice... "Me too."
Friends, I love you. And to my one friend in particular... I'm sorry.
Bless,
I've been reading the book 'Sex God' by Rob Bell. There's a part in this book that I was reading yesterday that talks about the cross.
"It speaks to us of God's suffering, God's pain, God's broken heart. The cross is God's way of saying, "I know what it's like." The execution stake is the creator of the universe saying, "I know how you feel." Our tendency in the midst of suffering is to turn on God. To get angry and bitter and shake our fist at the sky and say, "God, you don't know what it's like! You don't understand! You have no idea what I'm going through. You don't have a clue how much this hurts." The cros is God's way of taking away all of our accusations, excuses, and arguments. The cross is God taking on flesh and blood and saying, "Me too.""
Today I may or may not have a reason to feel the way I do. More importantly, I caused somebody else pain and for that I'm beating myself up inside. I'm human. I trust the wrong people and I say the wrong things. For that I'm sorry.. deeply sorry.
Sometimes when it rains... I like to think that God is crying with me. He knows our pain. He's experienced heartbreak and being wrongly accused and his good intentions taken the wrong way. He's been there. He has the wounds. So today, while my heart is hurting for whatever reason may or may not be there, I'll listen for that still small voice... "Me too."
Friends, I love you. And to my one friend in particular... I'm sorry.
Bless,
Monday, October 12, 2009
a cracked skull and Great Grandma Whoopi
sigh. I just don't know what to think of this day haha. So, I'm about to unleash all of my mixed up, good and the ugly thoughts of the day. Disclaimer: this potentially may not be my most reader friendly entry. It's jumbled thoughts, it's messy, but it's me at the moment. Okay, here we go...
I'm upset with a friend right now and I don't even know why.. I think I have a problem with my pride. -oh! 11*11 make a wish!- It's gotten really cold here lately and I'm not happy about it. Fall is my season and I feel like i've gotten short changed this year, like it's trying to turn into winter too quickly. The apartment is so cold. We turned it up to 80 but apparently that isn't working. The key is layers. I had hot apple cider this morning.. bliss. Practice tonight was so fun!! Everything about it was just sooo good...the way it's supposed to be. I cracked my skull on the floor when i was going for a ball. It hurt a lot but I'm just so thankful it wasn'tanything serious. I've seen sister go through all her concussions and it's a scary thing. I'm thankful to be healthy and injury free and blessed with the gifts i have to do the things i do. I don't want to take that for granted. One of my friends tonight told me I remind her of her great grandma 'Whoopi?'. That's probably the best compliment I had all day. On the other hand, my marketing teacher told me I was quiet today... I wanted to punch him in the face. Last night I went to go visit my best friend. We shopped and had coffee and caught up on life and facebook stalked and schemed. I only get her in small portions these days, but I tell ya... that once every other week visit with her is what I look forward to most anymore. She's a wonderful person and I'm just so blessed to have someone I can talk to like her in my life. Speaking of wonderful people in my life.... my roommates. I love them. They make me laugh every day and again I just stop and smile and think how deeply blessed I am.
So my prayer for the past month or so has been that God will put a new 'person' in my life. You'd understand the meaning of 'person' better if you were an avid Grey's fan like me haha but you know what I mean. Everyone has their 'person.' The person they go to when their world is falling apart.. the person they call when something really funny just happened. I've been wanting a new person because I've known I needed to distance myself from my old person. Not until just recently I'm discovering the challenge I've been given to appreciate all of the people I already have. Intentional community. I praise my Father for always providing me with the right people to love me.. to stand beside me and be on my side.. to challenge me to let go of things that hurt me... to make me laugh... to bring joy into my day. Our God is a good God. His love always finds a way to us.
Friends, remember that I love you and appreciate you way more than you'll ever know. Make it a beautiful day.
Bless,
I'm upset with a friend right now and I don't even know why.. I think I have a problem with my pride. -oh! 11*11 make a wish!- It's gotten really cold here lately and I'm not happy about it. Fall is my season and I feel like i've gotten short changed this year, like it's trying to turn into winter too quickly. The apartment is so cold. We turned it up to 80 but apparently that isn't working. The key is layers. I had hot apple cider this morning.. bliss. Practice tonight was so fun!! Everything about it was just sooo good...the way it's supposed to be. I cracked my skull on the floor when i was going for a ball. It hurt a lot but I'm just so thankful it wasn'tanything serious. I've seen sister go through all her concussions and it's a scary thing. I'm thankful to be healthy and injury free and blessed with the gifts i have to do the things i do. I don't want to take that for granted. One of my friends tonight told me I remind her of her great grandma 'Whoopi?'. That's probably the best compliment I had all day. On the other hand, my marketing teacher told me I was quiet today... I wanted to punch him in the face. Last night I went to go visit my best friend. We shopped and had coffee and caught up on life and facebook stalked and schemed. I only get her in small portions these days, but I tell ya... that once every other week visit with her is what I look forward to most anymore. She's a wonderful person and I'm just so blessed to have someone I can talk to like her in my life. Speaking of wonderful people in my life.... my roommates. I love them. They make me laugh every day and again I just stop and smile and think how deeply blessed I am.
So my prayer for the past month or so has been that God will put a new 'person' in my life. You'd understand the meaning of 'person' better if you were an avid Grey's fan like me haha but you know what I mean. Everyone has their 'person.' The person they go to when their world is falling apart.. the person they call when something really funny just happened. I've been wanting a new person because I've known I needed to distance myself from my old person. Not until just recently I'm discovering the challenge I've been given to appreciate all of the people I already have. Intentional community. I praise my Father for always providing me with the right people to love me.. to stand beside me and be on my side.. to challenge me to let go of things that hurt me... to make me laugh... to bring joy into my day. Our God is a good God. His love always finds a way to us.
Friends, remember that I love you and appreciate you way more than you'll ever know. Make it a beautiful day.
Bless,
Saturday, October 10, 2009
big city dreams
do you ever get super excited just about even the idea of something? I do. I do a lot. I'm a dreamer and I come up with these crazy ideas for my life. I'd say maybe 18% of them actually pan out, but I get super excited with each new idea nevertheless. But you know, I'm okay with that. Most of my crazy life ideas have to do with spontaneous trips. Like I said, a lot of those ideas never really come to be, but I've also had some pretty great adventures result from these crazy ideas. Okay so here's what I've got for tonight...
For the past three summers I've worked at the family farm. Don't get me wrong, it's been a real blessing that I've had that available to me, but I'm determined that this summer I'm going to get away from this place and go out and experience something new. Thus, I'm starting the job search early. Don't dare tell me I don't try! haha. Over the past week I've really just had the city of Chicago on my mind. It's weird. I don't even know. But it keeps coming up in conversation and just...weird. And soo...I began googling internships in Chicago because I kind of need an internship to graduate (even though I might get that taken care of in January...annnnyways..) So I came across a program called University of Dreams (just sounds Lindsayish huh? lol) okay so basically how this works is you apply to the program and they gaurantee to place you in an internships in a program of your choice (marketing, fashion... you name it pretty much) and you also get to pick your city (chicago, la, nyc, LONDON...) and with the tuiton you pay for this program they include your housing and meals and bus fees and everything for those 8 weeks. and they bring in speakers once a week and have weekend trips to explore the city and you're living with all these other college students in the program... So pretty much I'm thinking this sounds really great. I would never be able to set all of this up for myself. I just feel like I want to get away for a summer. I want a new city. I want new people. I want to start figuring things out about what I want.
So this is my newest dream pursuit lol. But let's not laugh at it yet...because every 18 out of 100 times I actually find a way to pull these things off and follow through. :)
Another thought of the day.... I really want to go back to Italy. More on that later maybe.
song of the day: Party in the USA- miley cyrus. You know you like it too!!
I love you all. A lot.
Blessings,
For the past three summers I've worked at the family farm. Don't get me wrong, it's been a real blessing that I've had that available to me, but I'm determined that this summer I'm going to get away from this place and go out and experience something new. Thus, I'm starting the job search early. Don't dare tell me I don't try! haha. Over the past week I've really just had the city of Chicago on my mind. It's weird. I don't even know. But it keeps coming up in conversation and just...weird. And soo...I began googling internships in Chicago because I kind of need an internship to graduate (even though I might get that taken care of in January...annnnyways..) So I came across a program called University of Dreams (just sounds Lindsayish huh? lol) okay so basically how this works is you apply to the program and they gaurantee to place you in an internships in a program of your choice (marketing, fashion... you name it pretty much) and you also get to pick your city (chicago, la, nyc, LONDON...) and with the tuiton you pay for this program they include your housing and meals and bus fees and everything for those 8 weeks. and they bring in speakers once a week and have weekend trips to explore the city and you're living with all these other college students in the program... So pretty much I'm thinking this sounds really great. I would never be able to set all of this up for myself. I just feel like I want to get away for a summer. I want a new city. I want new people. I want to start figuring things out about what I want.
So this is my newest dream pursuit lol. But let's not laugh at it yet...because every 18 out of 100 times I actually find a way to pull these things off and follow through. :)
Another thought of the day.... I really want to go back to Italy. More on that later maybe.
song of the day: Party in the USA- miley cyrus. You know you like it too!!
I love you all. A lot.
Blessings,
Wednesday, October 7, 2009
stop. breathe. go.
Wow. So life got crazy busy this week and I feel like I don't know what just hit me. But alas, I've found some time to gather my thoughts and give you a little something to read. Here goes.
Hi friends :) how are you? how are you really? I feel like I don't ask the people in my life that enough. I've been so caught up in my own craziness that I've kind of sucked at living in relationship with the people around me. Another thought I've had pressing on me is the reason for doing the things I do. We pour so much of ourselves out into everything we're involved in... we pour ourselves into our school work, into our extra curriculars, into our relationships.. who's getting the glory? "So whether you eat or drink, or whatever you do, do all to the glory of God." (1 Cor. 10:31) But what does that even mean?? Honestly, I don't have a real good answer and I'm still learning. I've had a quote up on my wall for the past couple weeks. It reads, "God is most glorified in us when we are most satisfied in Him." ....food for thought.
And so with life feeling overwhelming and my lack of understanding and my lack of strength, faith, and hope, I turn to the Psalms. The thing I love about the Psalms is how real they are. Sometimes you read through them and think, 'wow, that's a little dramatic..' but you know.. I think God is okay with us being a little dramatic when we go to Him. He loves when we're real with Him and passionately pursue Him and lay our burdens down before Him.
Trust in the Lord and do good; so you will live in the land, and enjoy security. Take delight in the Lord and he will give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the Lord; trust in him, and he will act. Be still before the Lord, and wait patiently for him. (Psalm 37:3-5, 7a)
Why are you cast down, O my soul, and why are you disquieted within me? Hope in God; for I shall again praise him, my help and my God. By day the Lord commands his steadfast love, and at night his son is with me, a prayer to the God of my life. (Psalm 42: 5,8)
My soul finds rest in God alone; my salvation comes from him. He alone is my rock and my salvation; he is my fortress, I will never be shaken. (Psalm 62:1-2)
Bless the Lord, O my soul, and do not forget all his benefits—who forgives all your sins and heals all your diseases, who redeems your life from the pit and crowns you with love and compassion, who satisfies your desires with good things so that your youth is renewed like the eagle's. (Psalm 103:2-5)
A few more things before I leave you....
story of the day: one time... we were driving over to practice and Megan's car broke down. Courtney and I attempted to push it the rest of the way to the perc. This failed. Thank you to the good Samaritan that stopped to help and pulled us the rest of the way in his truck.
a special thanks: to mothers. I'm pretty sure they are what makes the world go round.
Tim's encouragement of the day: (actually yesterday's because I especially liked it): Instead of telling God how big your storm is, tell the storm how big your God is!
Idea of the day: I need a personal assistant. I might have my little brother move in to fill this position.
Prayer request: Praise that Bekah's surgery went well today :) Please pray for a good recovery and patience for her as she deals with that.
Love you all!!
Blessings,
Hi friends :) how are you? how are you really? I feel like I don't ask the people in my life that enough. I've been so caught up in my own craziness that I've kind of sucked at living in relationship with the people around me. Another thought I've had pressing on me is the reason for doing the things I do. We pour so much of ourselves out into everything we're involved in... we pour ourselves into our school work, into our extra curriculars, into our relationships.. who's getting the glory? "So whether you eat or drink, or whatever you do, do all to the glory of God." (1 Cor. 10:31) But what does that even mean?? Honestly, I don't have a real good answer and I'm still learning. I've had a quote up on my wall for the past couple weeks. It reads, "God is most glorified in us when we are most satisfied in Him." ....food for thought.
And so with life feeling overwhelming and my lack of understanding and my lack of strength, faith, and hope, I turn to the Psalms. The thing I love about the Psalms is how real they are. Sometimes you read through them and think, 'wow, that's a little dramatic..' but you know.. I think God is okay with us being a little dramatic when we go to Him. He loves when we're real with Him and passionately pursue Him and lay our burdens down before Him.
Trust in the Lord and do good; so you will live in the land, and enjoy security. Take delight in the Lord and he will give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the Lord; trust in him, and he will act. Be still before the Lord, and wait patiently for him. (Psalm 37:3-5, 7a)
Why are you cast down, O my soul, and why are you disquieted within me? Hope in God; for I shall again praise him, my help and my God. By day the Lord commands his steadfast love, and at night his son is with me, a prayer to the God of my life. (Psalm 42: 5,8)
My soul finds rest in God alone; my salvation comes from him. He alone is my rock and my salvation; he is my fortress, I will never be shaken. (Psalm 62:1-2)
Bless the Lord, O my soul, and do not forget all his benefits—who forgives all your sins and heals all your diseases, who redeems your life from the pit and crowns you with love and compassion, who satisfies your desires with good things so that your youth is renewed like the eagle's. (Psalm 103:2-5)
A few more things before I leave you....
story of the day: one time... we were driving over to practice and Megan's car broke down. Courtney and I attempted to push it the rest of the way to the perc. This failed. Thank you to the good Samaritan that stopped to help and pulled us the rest of the way in his truck.
a special thanks: to mothers. I'm pretty sure they are what makes the world go round.
Tim's encouragement of the day: (actually yesterday's because I especially liked it): Instead of telling God how big your storm is, tell the storm how big your God is!
Idea of the day: I need a personal assistant. I might have my little brother move in to fill this position.
Prayer request: Praise that Bekah's surgery went well today :) Please pray for a good recovery and patience for her as she deals with that.
Love you all!!
Blessings,
Thursday, October 1, 2009
crunch, crunch... it's fall
(that title is for you, Bekah!) first of all, welcome to my blog!! It makes me smile that you stopped by. WOW, I am so overcome by so many thoughts and ideas that I want to share with you, but with regards to not wanting to overwhelm in my first post I'll try to keep it light and fresh.
Quick introduction time. I'm Lindsay. I'm new to this whole blogging thing so please just go with me on this one for awhile haha. Actually, that is false. I've kept a private 'blog' for a couple years now but it's really a new game when I open it up to everyone. The concept kind of freaks me out but it also really excites me. The inspiration behind this blog is a new book I bought last week. It's called '99 things to do between here & heaven.' #26...Blog. So, here we go! My desire is that by sharing in my thoughts, ideas, inspirations, and ridiculous stories you'll find this a place that will bless your day. For those few friends I have following... I love you guys. Thanks for giving me your time. For those random people that come across my page... I'm glad you're here and I hope you'll come back :)
**story of the day: One time... my roommate ran over a guy with her car that was on a bicycle. He fell off. She drove off. Erica, you fill my life with laughter and I love you for that!
**(8?) reasons why I love October:
1)colors of fall...creation revealing His majesty
2)stepping on crunchy leaves
3)give me some jeans, a hoodie, and a scarf...so perfect.
4)moccossins - all day, every day.
5)1812 reinactment festival - sometimes..I just wish I was native american.
6)volleyball season - another month with great girls and the game we love
7)warm drinks that warm your soul
8)season for change - yes please.
Well friends, thanks for coming by. Please come back soon. I hope you have a really wonderful day. Love you all.
Quick introduction time. I'm Lindsay. I'm new to this whole blogging thing so please just go with me on this one for awhile haha. Actually, that is false. I've kept a private 'blog' for a couple years now but it's really a new game when I open it up to everyone. The concept kind of freaks me out but it also really excites me. The inspiration behind this blog is a new book I bought last week. It's called '99 things to do between here & heaven.' #26...Blog. So, here we go! My desire is that by sharing in my thoughts, ideas, inspirations, and ridiculous stories you'll find this a place that will bless your day. For those few friends I have following... I love you guys. Thanks for giving me your time. For those random people that come across my page... I'm glad you're here and I hope you'll come back :)
**story of the day: One time... my roommate ran over a guy with her car that was on a bicycle. He fell off. She drove off. Erica, you fill my life with laughter and I love you for that!
**(8?) reasons why I love October:
1)colors of fall...creation revealing His majesty
2)stepping on crunchy leaves
3)give me some jeans, a hoodie, and a scarf...so perfect.
4)moccossins - all day, every day.
5)1812 reinactment festival - sometimes..I just wish I was native american.
6)volleyball season - another month with great girls and the game we love
7)warm drinks that warm your soul
8)season for change - yes please.
Well friends, thanks for coming by. Please come back soon. I hope you have a really wonderful day. Love you all.
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